jay and silent bob strike back deleted scenes

Matt Damon: They gotta break into Provasik now. Well, maybe he just has manners. That shit is the mad notes. The Market research says that people love monkeys. Goals Steal Jewels. Jay: When Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) are finally forced to stop hanging out by the Quick-Stop by a restraining order, they discover that a movie based on the comic that's based on them, Bluntman and Chronic, is in production. We at View Askew respect the noble Platypus, and it is not our intention to slight these stupid creatures in any way. Suzanne is abducted by a Hollywood animal acting agency, and Jay and Silent Bob arrive in Hollywood. It may not be my way, but damn if there doesn't go one happy family. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - DVD Talk Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back Extended Scene - YouTube Stealing, boning, blowing shit up, and now you're like this little priss with a conscience. 42 deleted Scenes with Intros by Kevin Smith and guests "Why Movies Cost So Much: Comicon Gag Reel" with intro Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash with intros: - "Judd Nelson" There's a script for this movie? Though it'll go without saying ten minutes or so into these proceedings, View Askew would like to state that this film is - from start to finish - a work of comedic fantasy, not to be taken seriously. This job just passed the point of no return! What's with the knife, we havin' cake or something? After the credits, God (Dogma) closes the View Askewniverse book.[2]. Justice: Dvd Review: "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" - Screen It Holy Shit. Brodie Bruce is a fictional character played by Jason Lee in the Kevin Smith films Mallrats and Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. It's the new millennium. Chaka's Production Assistant: Holden: R. . Whillenholly: Now I gotta beat the shit out of those punch-sucker little bitches. Jay says you guys had a Star Wars themed wedding, and you tied the knot dressed as Storm Troopers. Whillenholly: In a world gone mad, we will not spank the monkey, but the monkey will spank us. What if they're creating an army of them? Holden: Jay: She went for the set up. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) Available on HBO Max Much like how the solo movies in the MCU eventually lead to a team-up Avengers movie, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back feels like the culmination of the entire View Askewniverse up to that point. Jay: Remember, folks stimulation of the C.L.I.T is not recommended. "[18][19] In August 2001, Mike Schulz of River Cities' Reader wrote that, "for sheer laughs, both mindless and incredibly smart, nothing since 1997's Waiting for Guffman has even compared."[20]. Fred: So all we's gotta do is stop this fuckin' movie from getting made! Don't change the subject. Silent Bob: Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith, Shannon Elizabeth, Ali Larter, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Jason Lee, "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" film review, The BBC is not responsible for the content of external websites. Goddamn yous all to hell! You've got the wrong guys! This guy'll suck your dick. [15], Roger Ebert gave the film 3 out of 4 stars, writing that "[w]hether you will like 'Jay and Silent Bob' depends on who you are Kevin Smith's movies are either made specifically for you, or specifically not made for you". He LOVES the cock. P.S. Holden: Say, would you like a chocolate covered pretzel? Jay: Especially you. I mean, I don't think I'm alone in the world in imagining this flick may be the worst idea since Greedo shooting first. Well, we want somethin' for our mental anguish. Watch the language, little boy! What are Kevin Smith's next 5 movies? : r/ViewAskewniverse I'm a noble rabbit Jay: Jay: A scene in the stash where Brodie interacts with a customer, A scene in the stash where Brodie impersonates Jay. All you motherfuckers are gonna pay. You put your dick in a pie! Look, man. More on the set of Bluntman and Chronic. [Throws Brent out the door of the van, flips him off as he's looking out the door as they're still driving] Uh, Chaka? What a motherfucker, man! It does whatever the fuck I tell it to. Jay: Jay: This article's plot summary may be too long or excessively detailed. I watched Dogma: the funniest movie I have ever seen. THE SIGN on the back of the car said "Critters Of HOLLYWOOD", YOU DUMB FUCK! Filled with cameos and in-jokes, the riotous road comedy stars Ben Affleck, Shannon Elizabeth, Will Ferrell, Jason Mewes. See production, box office & company info. Now we can finally solve the mystery of the hitchhiking ghouls. Uh, three by my count, but close. Went to film school. See, I knocked up this hot woman friend of ours that I fuck on the side so as to not be all the way gay, but my tubby husband here is 100% queer. Wes? Jay: Okay, here's the deal. James Van Der Beek: COMMANDER! Hooker #2: Have you seen the price of bus tickets lately. Well, how do you know he doesn't smoke monkey pole? While the girls steal the diamonds, Jay and Silent Bob free the animals, stealing an orangutan named Suzanne. Jay: Why are you shooting at me? The film also stars Shannon Elizabeth, Jason Lee, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Will Ferrell, Eliza Dushku, Ali Larter, and Chris Rock, among many others, most of which in cameo appearances. Holden: The officers find footage of a video Sissy recorded of Jay claiming to be "the clit commander", with accompanying literature that "Clit" is an acronym for Coalition for the Liberation of Itinerant Tree-Dwellers. Great. Why is this movie not available on iTunes, or any other digital download platform? Customer at Quick Stop: However, Catholic tradition insists that these four (and some sisters also mentioned in the text) were cousins of Jesus and not siblings, thus maintaining the Perpetual Virginity of Mary. [he kisses Justice's hand romantically; she smiles and moves to the front of the van. [screams] Speakin' of lickin' balls, man, how 'bout that Justice chick? (failed) Backup on the way Sissy: Gus? In 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' (2001), a guy who comes out and clicks the clapperboard for a few seconds is Paul Dini, an Emmy-winning writer who first created the character Harley Quinn on Batman TAS (this is part of the commentary) (January 2015) (Learn how and when to remove this template message)(Learn how and when to remove this template message) No, it always comes back to that fucking pie! If you were funnier than that, ABC wouldn't have cancelled us. The Internet is a communication tool used the world over where people can come together to bitch about movies and share pornography with one another. That's right. Holden: [14] Audiences surveyed by CinemaScore gave the film an average grade of "B+" on an A+ to F scale. Damn, these white boys can't fight. Jesus loves the little children Angel Jay: See? And might I add, that is one fine looking boy you are raising. Chaka: Two-disc set. Will you fuck me when you get out? What's the worst fuckin' thing that can fuckin' happen to ya just standing outside a fuckin' store, right? Jay: Because we may very well be dealing with the two most dangerous men on the planet. They escape as the police arrive and the van explodes, believing the girls have perished. Fuck you and your Dawson's Crap! Ben Affleck: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back Quotes Hey, little man! This movie is gonna make House Party look like House Party 2. Angel slaps Jay with his harp]. [over Gordon's walkie talkie] [Jay and Silent Bob run in and grab the monkey]. This quiz is based SOLELY on the movie, not on any extra scenes that may be found on the DVD. Alyssa Jones: Jay's Mother: Director Kevin Smith Writer Kevin Smith (characters) Stars Jason Mewes Kevin Smith Ben Affleck See production, box office & company info Watch on Prime Video They put those guys in a bunch of movies. Hey look, I'm sorry I dragged you away from whatever-gay-serial-killers-who-ride-horses-and-like-to-play-golf-touchy-feely-picture you're supposed to be doing this week. Banky: This not only ties into the bad writing, but ALSO the bad acting and bad directing. Dogma (1999) - IMDb Disclaimer: 1) a renunciation of any claim to or connection with; 2) disavowal; 3) a statement made to save one's own ass. 104 min. You need two hands. Audio Commentary One Director Kevin Smith is joined by co-star Jason Mewes and producer Scott Mosier for a commentary that's a banal waste of disc space. Hey! Just use the little one's crush on you to convince him, since he's SO fucking in love with you. Whether ambitious thematically, ("Dogma", "Chasing Amy"), or outright comedy, ("Mallrats"), the movies as a whole were less satisfactory than their many very funny parts. [7][8] From February to June 2019, Smith additionally re-adapted the plot of the film to the character of Mindy McCready / Hit-Girl in the relaunched Image comic book series, titled Hit-Girl: The Golden Rage of Hollywood, with Dave Lizewski filling the role of Banky Edwards.[9]. Are you even supposed to be here today? Pull of their masks and let's see who they really are! Brodie: Chaka's Production Assistant: It must be a conspiracy like in the X-Files *Roswell* style! Filming took in place in New Jersey, and mostly in California. Echo Base: Hey, watch the language, little boy. Whenever you see C.L.I.T., you'll see this fucking face. Watch What Roles Was Ben Affleck Considered For? Angel Jay: You know it, but a Jay and Silent Bob movie? For some reason, everybody decides to use that voice to bitch about movies. [cut to Jay outside, hollering at a woman walking past him]. I can't belive this shit. James Van Der Beek: Angel Jay: Now they may be gay, but that's not their son. Word, bitch, Phantoms like a motherfucker. Cock-Knocker: Your browser's Javascript functionality is turned off. The latest View Askewniverse installment, Jay and Silent Bob Reboot, includes an outtakes joke that pokes fun at the narrative premise. Well, to have all these fucks stop talking shit about us on the Internet. A deleted scene has the duo watch a Daredevil movie being filmed. Okay, you two. Chaka Luther King: [while masturbating to donkey / girl porn] GHOULS, you fuckin' moron, not girls! It's either this or jail. I am the master of the C.L.I.T. Additionally, Wes Craven, Jules Asner, Steve Kmetko, Gus Van Sant, Jason Biggs, James Van Der Beek, Shannen Doherty, and Morris Day all appear as themselves. Holden: Go to hell, Pacey! Will you fuck me when you get out? hilarious deleted scenes back into the movie, making this the longest and most complete version of Jay and Silent Bob ever. You don't know "Jungle Love?" Remind me to renew that restraining order. Jay: [with a black eye, appears out of nowhere and singing] And she'll be, like, "Oh, I've read on the Internet that you's guys are a couple of little. Maybe it's because girls don't like to be called bitches, Jay. What more could two guys from New Jersey want? Walt "Fanboy" Grover: And then she goes and sucks two other guys' dicks off instead. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who is makin' the movie we're gonna make them eat our shit, then shit out our shit, and then eat their shit that's made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. This store sure does suck ass, doesn't it? Here's your coffee sir. I hope one rips the other one's shirt off and we see some fuckin titties floppin around, yeah! What? . Ergo, you find yourself in a VERY actionable position. Fuck you, you already said half. [his first words] Missy: Hey, stop stealing monkeys. WHO'S STUPID NOW, DIRTY SHEEP FUCKER! Whillenholly: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - amazon.com Nothing more to add to this one, shes just annoying. All right, gang, let's just shoot some tear gas into the diner, and then when the guys come out with the monkey, we'll Fuckbeans. The site's critical consensus reads, "Fans can expect a good laugh as the cast from Smith's previous films reunite for Jay and Silent Bob's last bow. These are just SOME of the reasons this movie is bad. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back / Funny - TV Tropes Well, um, let me just talk to the other girls and get back to you. Okay, play it cool, hot shot. Jay: Who's watching these babies? [Justice and Sissy are engaged in a fist-fight]. View Askewniverse - Wikipedia We've gotta go. Mua-ha-ha-ha! Last 3 plays: kylemartins99 . But then sometimes you gotta do the payback picture because your friend says you owe him. Whillenholly: Hiding inside a diner, the pair dress Suzanne as a child and pretend to be a gay couple, with Suzanne as their kid. Jay: I *AM* wearing pansy red booties, Matt Damon: Thank you again and enjoy the show. And I can't believe fine-ass bitches like yourselves eat that shit. Teen #2: I thought that was a 10-82. Youse guys need to turn those frowns upside down, and I got just the thing for that we call it DOOBIE SNACKS! Technically, the DVDs are good, just as you'd expect from Buena Vista. Brent: And we do want to say to the people at home, the clit is not something to be played with. Gag Reel Kevin Smith returns with another introduction to yet more crap footage. Tell you what: let's settle this monetarily. Chaka: Aren't you the guy who fucked the pie! Reg Hartner: The C.L.I.T is not real. Banky: Make it fast and sexy. Oh my God. Are you fucking crazy? Passerby: This page has been archived and is no longer updated. Walt "Fanboy" Grover: Oh, Hi, I'm Jay and this is my hetero-life-mate, Silent Bob. Guide to Morris Day and the Time Don't know anything about this funk band? One: we're walking, talking, bad girl cliches. You're doubling me, obviously. Matt Damon: But when the dopey duo learn that theyve been cut out of the cash, they set out to sabotage the flick at all costs. And this is your finger, far away from the pulse, jammed straight up your ass. That's what I thought. Brent: I'm just a Federal Wildlife Marshall. Whillenholly: Jay : What buzz? Not this little fuck. They've got a monkey in there? Holy shit, dude. Oh, that Affleck! Metatron: God? Fuck them up their stupid asses. Published Apr 18, 2020 Jay and Silent Bob Reboot's outtakes reveal a hilarious running joke that doubles as a commentary on society's attitude toward Hollywood. It stars Jason Mewes and Smith respectively as the two eponymous characters. Whillenholly: Right. What the fuck are you talking about? Meeting the film's racist director Chaka Luther King, who mistakes them for stunt doubles, Jay and Silent Bob are forced to fight Mark Hamill, playing the supervillain Cocknocker (a combination of Hamill's roles as The Joker, The Trickster, and Luke Skywalker) in a Star Wars-esque battle. No, I'm in this because I LOOOVE animals, stupid? What do we do with them now? Fred: Jay: Uh the fat one's watchin the little one? Jay: (her character was deleted from the movie), is shown on a billboard in the film. Well, actually there was this one time Clark: I didn't think so. The UK cinema version altered a line of dialogue to receive a 15 certificate. Dude, I think I just filled the cup. But funny. Get the fuck off her. I look into his sorry doe eyes and I just, I see a man crying out. In prison, he'll be the pie. Jay: Check this shit out. Did you ever get to 3rd base with her? Jay: Amazon.com: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back : Movies & TV Damn. Rumor is Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are working on a super secret project on the lot. Spread my cheeks, so he can see the fucking stink nuggets! Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) mistakes - Moviemistakes.com Don't you know fast food makes girls fart? The C.L.I.T. That's the ape. I'm a smooth pimp who loves the pussy. Justice: So please - before you think about hurting someone over this trifle of a film, remember: even God has a sense of humor. The pair jump into a sewer system, and Willenholly is tricked into jumping off a dam. Jay and Silent Bob - YouTube Suzanne beats up the actors, knocking them out, and Jay and Silent Bob assume the roles. And Tubby here is my black man servant. "-influenced bike scene, (6) Bob stepping out of a room with a goofy grin on his face while Jay tokes up, and finally ends with (7) a hilarious blooper where Jay offers Suzanne the orangutan a hit off a joint. A monkey? You mean the guys in that Prince movie? [appears out of nowhere] . Velma: I thought they only did classy pictures, like "The Piano" and "The Crying Game". That was just another paean to male adolescence and its refusal to grow up. Oh, all right. The film was a minor commercial success, grossing $33.8 million worldwide from a $22 million budget, and received mixed reviews from critics. Look at me. Chaka: During pre-production, Mewes would have constant mood swings due to heroin withdrawal, to the point that Smith actually threw him out of his car on their way to the set one day. That was an incredibly daring escape! 42 Deleted Scenes with introduction by Kevin Smith and others. Well, *you're* in love. Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Boy, Walt. You actually watch that show? Jay: Something nice. That would never work as a movie. [16] Adam Smith of Empire gave the film 3/5 stars, writing that "[w]hen it's good it's very, very good, but when it's bad it's offensive", and noting that "the gag hit/miss ratio is really only about 50/50". Well, FUCK that. [Steve-Dave is forcing him onto his knees] Just say it already. We're gonna fuck your mothers while you watch and cry like little, whiny bitches. There are a few outtakes worth seeking out in this featurette, but the rest is dreck. Yeah, I'll bet you do. [Chrissy breaks wind loudly in the diamond vault, causing the alarms to go off]. [17] Scott Tobias of The A.V. [about "Dawson's Creek"] You the man. Jay: Whillenholly: The two-disc DVD release of "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" will take fans to a new frontier of stoner humour. What? Jay: Holden: An abortion clinic worker with a special heritage is called upon to save the existence of humanity from being negated by two renegade angels trying to exploit a loop-hole and reenter Heaven. Two reasons. Randal Graves: Justice: Ho Yay: Jay likes to constantly remind everyone within earshot that he likes the ladies, then he or Silent Bob says or does something suggesting that he is deep deep in the closet (Word of God says Jay is a closeted bisexual). For likeness rights? A Chasing Amy in-joke in Holden's apartment. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back: Hooker Scene - YouTube Dante: I wasn't even supposed to be here today!! There are no inadequacies. The scenes deemed particularly offensive included Jay's vehement refusal of giving oral sex to a male driver when hitchhiking, and Jay chastising Silent Bob for being willing to perform fellatio on him to get the security guard to let them go. Kevin Smith closes the book-literally-on his slacker reprobates with this fifth entry in his "View Askewniverse." Oh, you're the executive producer. I was a guard. Please turn it on so that you can experience the full capabilities of this site. No, Bill Cosby did the whole thing with a roller and it was EXCELLENT. Shannen Doherty: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) - IMDb Learn the surprising story with this compact guide. Sissy: [Will pulls out his shotgun and blows the guy away]. Terms and Conditions Privacy Policy California Privacy Rights. Holy Fuck! Since Bethany only knows Catholic doctrine, the news that Mary had other children comes as a surprise to her. Fuckin' smokin'! Silent Bob: Brodie: There they are! Oh, that's it, honey! Jason Biggs: You gotta do the safe picture. Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back DVD Kevin Smith 2 disc collectors edition at the best online prices at eBay! Let's remember who talked who into doing this shit in the first place. James Van Der Beek: Jason Biggs: Willenholly: Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: 2hr. How 'bout "fine piece of ass"? These shots include: (1) Jay and Bob in a plane, (2) the two drinking beers (at the appropriate moment of "Jay's Rap") on the set of "Good Will Hunting 2: Hunting Season", (3) Jay and Bob outside a parking lot, (4) an alternate take of Jay miming sucking a breast in "Brodie's Comic Stash", (5) Jay smoking a cigarette during the "E.T. Whillenholly: Jay: James Van Der Beek: Oh, you like that, MULE. Chaka: Well, look at these morose motherfuckers right here. Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back - amazon.com Free shipping for many products! Oh sweet irony! Okay men let's shoot some tear gas into the diner and when they come out we'll Fuck beans! Chased by studio security guard Gordon through the Miramax lot and reclaiming Suzanne from the set of Scream 4, Jay and Silent Bob end up in the dressing room of Jason Biggs and James Van Der Beek, the actors playing Bluntman and Chronic in the film. Why didn't Miramax option his other comic instead. Wow! In this world gone mad, we won't spank the monkey- the monkey will spank us. 1 Justice: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back DVD (2001) Reviewed by Almar Haflidason: . Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK KEVIN SMITH DIMENSION REGION 2 PAL DVD at the best online prices at eBay! I feel for you boys, I really do. All video and DVD versions restore that line. Miramax Security Guard Gordon: No, bullshit, because I wasn't WITH a hooker today, ha-HA! No, but it's Miramax. If the buzz is any indicator, that movie's gonna make some huge bank. Still Galleries (On the Set, Birth of a Poster and Jay and Silent Bob Comics). When they get to the Miramax lot, they find themselves in the background of an E! Jay: Whillenholly: Do you want to get shot? Until it happened to me. Jay: Jay: Seeing the film's negative reception online,[10] the pair set out for Hollywood to prevent the film from tainting their image, or at least to receive the royalties owed to them. But I did see Casey Affleck buying a soda from a concession stand. Hey shove it, Bounce-boy. Hi, I'm Banky Edwards, the creator of "Bluntman and Chronic." Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. You're that guy from Loser" or "Hey you rocked in Boys and Girls." Cast and Crew . When best buddies Jay and Silent Bob discover that a major motion picture is being based on their likenesses, the dopey duo head for hollywood to claim the movie money the deserve. The fuckin' mack daddys of fuckin' Jersey?" Jay: Right. [to his buddies] There's females present. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back / Trivia - TV Tropes I'll be right here waitin'. Filming began on January 14, 2001, and ended on April 19, 2001. Fuck! Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) Quotes Showing all 141 items Holden : If the buzz is any indicator, that movie's gonna make some huge bank. Jason Mewes Interview: Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back 20th Anniversary All The Easter Eggs (We Could Find) In Jay & Silent Bob Reboot - Movies Here's your coffee sir, booger-free. We're going to Hollywood! There's nothing you can do about it. Devil Jay 2: Hardcore fans may glean something from the rest of the material on this DVD release, but there's no getting away from the fact that this is lazy, mediocre content to dish-up. The Untold Truth Of Jay And Silent Bob - Looper.com Chaka's Production Assistant: That's what the Internet's for, slandering others anonymously! The monkey will spank us! And he's playing Chronic, aka Ray. [counting his money] Jay and Silent Bob get their royalties from Banky after Silent Bob informs him he violated their original likeness rights contract by not getting their permission before selling the film rights to Miramax, and could face serious legal troubles, and Justice turns herself and her former team in to Willenholly in exchange for a shorter sentence and freeing Jay and Silent Bob.